Get the party started with the classic early 50s version that started the whole phenomenon, Mr. Hankey the Christmas Pooh. If that doesn't get you in the South Park Christmas spirit, Mr. Garrison's energetic rendition of Merry F'ing Christmas will - unless you're one of those dirty heathens who don't celebrate the season. You'll join Mr. Hat in applauding this modern classic. Let's not forget the true meaning of Christmas, though - close your eyes and listen to Eric Cartman's beautiful version of Oh Holy Night - you can almost hear the angels' uh, something. Juan Swartz and the South Park Children's Choir try to bring you down by pointing out how we will all someday be Dead, Dead, Dead, but leave it to Mr. Mackey to get the eggnog nogging again with his beautiful Carol of the Bells, mmmkay. It's important we don't forget all the little Jewish children (even though Kyle's Mom has a history of ruining Christmas for everyone else), for, as Kyle Broslofski sings, it's hard to be The Lonely Jew on Christmas. For everyone else, though, it's a blast. Heck, even Shelly Marsh takes the time to sing the ditty-like I Saw Three Ships, although Stan and his turd friends don't make it easy for her. Then Stan Marsh and Wendy Testaburger team up to sing It Happened in Sun Valley.

It's time to get serious now, though. Who isn't moved to tears by Adolf Hitler's heartfelt rendition of O Tannenbaum? Even Satan is moved by it, ushering in Christmas Time in Hell; soon the Kennedys, Hitler, Mao Tse-tung, and even Michael Landon are joining in the South Park Christmas spirit. But it's time to return our focus to the reason for the season. Chef emerges to lay down a smooth groove on his beautiful rendition of that beloved Christmas classic, What the Hell Child is This? Of course, you can't have a Christmas album without the song Santa Claus is On His Way, sung the way only Mr. Hankey can sing it. Then Eric Cartman reminds us that Christmas isn't Christmas without a Swiss Colony Beef Log, and he really rocks the house when he decks the halls with boughs of Swiss Colony. At this point, the South Park Children's Choir returns to sing Hark the Herald Angels Sing - they don't sound like angels, I'm afraid. But what of poor Kyle? He's fine, playing Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel - this is a great medley featuring the entire Broslofski family along with Eric and Stan. The next track sort of speaks for itself, in a muffled sort of way, as Mr. Hankey and Kenny McCormick team up to sing the Most Offensive Xmas Song Ever. After Mr. Ose sings We Three Kings, Mr. Hankey, Stan, Kyle, and Eric close out the album with perennial favorite Have a Merry Little Christmas.

Obviously, if you are easily offended or have never understood what South Park is all about, you won't enjoy this album. They put that Explicit Lyrics sticker on there for a reason, you know. Those who can't stomach hilarious irreverence in their Christmas celebrations may in fact, after hearing this album, start some kind of anti-South Park campaign, so I would have to implore such people (and you know who you are) from listening to Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics. Let all the rest of us have our harmless little fun.


Better Than Bing Crosby   December 16, 1999
William Fricke (St. Paul, MN United States)
15 out of 16 found this review helpful

Explicit lyrics, offensive songs, potty humor, what more could you ask for from Trey and Matt? If you have a sense of humor about the world and yourself, you'll love this. If you don't, you probably wouldn't be reading this right now.

The lyrics are hysterical, but what impressed me most was the music itself. Marc Shaiman (and Trey) did an awesome job of writing and arranging these tunes. The arrangement of the "Driedel Song" is classic! I also know that Cartman's version of "Holy Night" has ruined me for any other recording of it. I also can't wait for the day when "Dead, Dead, Dead" is a staple at all elementary school holiday programs. It's catchy, easy to sing and will stick in your head, head, head...

There are a few disappointments (We Three Kings, Carol of the Bells, Six Ships and a couple of others), but who's perfect? That's why CD players are programmable.

A nice diversion from listening to the same old holiday music. Sure, you know most of the tunes, but I guarantee you'll never sing the original lyrics ever again! Just don't let Grandma catch you at the family sing-along this year.


Christmas Classics Is A Christmas Classic   December 11, 1999
Ben Belden (Pittsburgh PA)
13 out of 14 found this review helpful

Don't let the title of this CD fool you. While there are a few "traditional" Christmas songs, they aren't done in a serious way. The are sung by characters from South Park. By far the best of these is Eric Cartman singing 'O Holy Night'. Of the 18 tracks on here, 8 are completely new. Not that that's bad. Hearing Mr. Garrison (the 3rd grade teacher) sing 'Merry F--king Christmas' is great. And don't even get me started on 'The Most Offensive Song Ever' with Kenny and Mr. Hankey. Here's the scoop: if you're a South Park fan you won't need to buy this CD because you already have it. If you even the smallest bit of Christmas spirit and/or a sense of humor, buy this CD ASAP! Don't wait because Christmas CDs have a habit of disappearing after Christmas. And don't say I didn't warn you.


BOO YAH! THIS CD ROCKS!   December 3, 1999
Bill Frye (Morgantown, West Virginia)
11 out of 16 found this review helpful

This cd is filled with songs that will have you rolling. This cd is the funniest thing since the South Park: Bigger, Longer and Uncut Soundtrack has come out. A must have for any South Park fanatic!


Kudos to the creators of South Park from their oldest fan...   December 21, 1999
11 out of 12 found this review helpful

This album is wonderfully arranged, beautifully performed, hysterically funny, and sick, sick, sick. It is a must for anyone who is offended by the arrogance of Christianity, amused by bathroom humor, and tickled by (purposefully) overwrought, emotional production numbers.

I am a 45 year old woman, obviously not part of the South Park target audience, and am convinced the show, and its creators, get better every with every new project.

I nearly wrecked the car laughing while driving to work and hearing "Swiss Colony Beef Log" for the first time (surely a Michael Bolton-esque performance if ever there was one). God bless Cartman for his self-involvement (who cannot love a little boy who thanks Jesus for being born so that he could receive presents and pie?) Kudos, too, to the Most Offensive Song Ever Written (some of which I've managed to decipher, to my delight).

Great job, Matt and Trey! You're doing terrific work. Seriously.